78% of 18 year-olds in Foster care end up either incarcerated or homeless within two years of “aging out” of the system.
Gulp. Are you looking for a reason our jails are overcrowded?
The outlook for the 30,000 foster children in the United States who ”age out” of the system each year is bleak, according to a study led by University of Washington School of Social Work researcher Mark Courtney.
A young person in a foster home has the deck stacked against them to begin with, and this is the kind of future more than three-quarters of then have to look forward to. Our states, in a desperate move to save their budgets, are cutting even more programs to assist the transition. Halfway homes, college and technical school grants and counseling programs are all threatened over the next few critical years.
The solution? Hands down – the best possible answer is making sure these youth have a stable adult that will lead and advocate for them.
There just aren’t enough social workers and enough hours in the day to assist these kids. An adult - who has a sincere interest in preventing just one kid from repeating the cycle - has the chance of making a difference.
Finding a mentor who provides “that backbone you need” has made all the difference, said Cameron Anderson, 21, of Tampa, Fla., who entered foster care at 15 after he got into trouble with the law, then lived in group homes.
Last fall, Cameron was introduced to his mentor, an investor in Tampa, through a program called Connected by 25. The two now speak daily, Cameron said, discussing “school and life in general, even to the point where he’ll say, ‘Hey, are you using protection?’ ”
Had he had such a relationship earlier, Cameron said, “it would have saved me from a ton of bridges I’ve had to cross.”
A Montana social worker, Matt Anderson, is on a mission to educate the public about the pitfalls of American foster care, especially older children about to age out of the system. Matt is working to complete the documentary “From Place to Place” that follows teenagers who have turned 18 and left foster care.
He says, “the kids I worked with had an endless trail of disrupted relationships and very little contact with their biological families.” Then, he says, ”since aging out, many of these kids have gone on a journey to find their families.” “Unfortunately, the trail of disrupted relationships has continued. Human beings have an undeniable need to be connected and our most natural connection systems are our families. But when kids enter the system they often become very disconnected, which I believe is at the root of their behavioral outbursts, emotional instability, academic struggles, and other issues.”
Mentoring gives foster care teens a listening ear and a friend to guide them through their struggles. Mentoring relationships begun while foster care kids are in their mid-teens can be beneficial as the kids become more independent. Consider these mentoring possibilities:
- Mentor through the internet. VMentor.com allows mentors to form relationships with a foster care teens aged 16-23. This virtual mentoring system matches teens and mentors according to their interests and career aspirations. Each week, mentors communicate with their teens completely through email.
- Mentor through a local organization. Many local foster agencies provide mentorship programs for kids in foster care. These programs are often flexible, and allow mentors to set their own appointments according to their schedule. Simply call your nearest foster care agency to find out what opportunities are available.
- Mentor through a college program. College can be a challenge for foster care teens that don’t have home support. Ask the guidance office of your local college if the school provides a mentoring program for incoming foster care freshmen.
I currently mentor a 13 year-old girl who lives in a foster home with her twin sister. She is amazingly well-adjusted, but can’t understand why she can’t live with her biological mother. I don’t know either, and I don’t really want to know. Instead, I hope I give her a constant relationship in her life that provides stability. I track her progress in sports, school and socially. I never make judgements, but I let her know that each of these things are important to me. It’s not my role to punish or reward her. I am the one person she know will be there without exception. And, she says, that’s enough.
Think about mentoring… The rewards are – like the commercial says – priceless. Both for you, and the youth you mentor.
